A Parenting Moment

Gregor and I had been talking about taking the big girls to Katy Perry's Part of Me movie since we'd seen the preview at Brave.  They love her music (Firework & California Gurls have been dominating our summer soundtrack lately) and they were quite excited by the previews of all of her stage costumes. 

However, I become extremely cautious and protective when it comes to small people growing up too fast - perfect summer example - I cringe at little girls in bikinis when we're at the pool.  I want them to be able to stay rosy-cheeked innocents as long as possible.

So, we started to do a ton of research: plot summary, other moms' reviews and their kids' reactions, amount of 'language' in the film, etc.  The themes we came across were essentially:

  • My daughter's felt empowered!
  • Katy Perry shows girls that if they work hard they can have it all
  • What a fun show to see all of her concert performances
  • An inspiring movie
There were also a few that pointed out that her some of her song lyrics were suggestive.  This is valid, but having the girls listen to the Kidz Bop versions of her songs paired with their lack of awareness of what things like what "I want to see your Peacock" refer to, we decided to take them on the adventure to see it.

I will say for the most part they really enjoyed it.  What I was unprepared for was their genuine upset at the dissolution of her marriage. 

The film partially focused on this and during the scene where they show Katy discretely crying, I was bombarded with approximately 400 questions:
  • Is she sad because she misses her husband?
  • Why doesn't he come to see her?
  • Is she really, really tired?
  • She should go out on a date
Maybe it was my own projecting, but I couldn't help think that these little/big girls were so emotionally right on.

I tried to answer briefly and honestly and then redirect them to her flashy costumes and fancy songs.  They weren't buying it.

I'm sad to say the message that these littles walked away with was something along the lines of:  If you want to be famous, you can't be married.

Hey, maybe this is true. 

What I do know is that I spent the 10 minute car ride home reinforcing the positive notions that if you work hard you can do anything.  I paired: you can be a singer/doctor/artist/hairstylist/gymnast, etc...and a mom and wife.  I hope that message got through, too.

I also hope that seeing the marriage between Gregor and me is what made them have a bit more of an awareness about this part of the film.  Maybe wishful thinking, but one certainly can dream.


Unknown said...

You're a good mom. Your girls are lucky to have such awesome parents!

Unknown said...

The girls will look at your example long after they forget the one they saw in the film. You will continue to show them a loving marriage blessed by God.

Jill said...

It's so so so so hard to parent these people. And I know I turn to you ALL the time... so I'm in your corner. You are doing something right. Both of you.

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